What If SCP 3008 Was Real?

What If SCP 3008 Was Real?

January 8, 2020 61 By Ewald Bahringer


Hello fellow friends and philosophers, and
welcome back to the most mind-bending channel on YouTube: Life’s Biggest Questions. I’m your voice in the void, Keegan Hughes,
and we have a brand new, extra-odd SCP video for you today. Before we get to the main topic of today’s
video, there’s a special message we’d like to address:
Today’s video is sponsored by The Great Courses Plus. If you have any interest in learning from
some of the world’s finest educators on any device you own, make sure to click the
link in the description to get started on your free trial! I’m always learning new things on the job,
whether I’m researching legendary monsters, or finding behind-the-scenes insight about
horror movies. As a content creator, filmmaker, and lifelong
learner, I’m always looking for new ways to approach ideas. I find the best way to learn is to find masters
of an artform, and see how they do things. That’s why I think The Great Courses Plus
is such a fantastic resource for folks looking to learn! The Great Courses Plus is a subscription-based
on-demand video service filled to the brim with top-notch lectures and courses from excellent
professors, educators, and experts from all sorts of fields. By subscribing, you get access to over eleven
thousand video lectures about anything that interests you, whether it be filmmaking, literature,
math, history, cooking, and more. The Monsters Within course taught by Professor
Eric R. Williams and two other experts on things that go bump in the night is a fascinating
look at how scary stories are formulated to get under your skin and stay with you late
at night. Perfect for you folks that love our LBQ content,
but maybe get a little creeped out by some of the topics. Right now The Great Courses Plus is offering
viewers a free trial, click the link in the description to start yours today! Outstanding, now let’s redirect our focus
to SCP-3008. Have you ever been lost in an IKEA? Apparently it’s a pretty common occurrence. Those big, labyrinthian warehouses make it
real easy for you to take a wrong turn and lose your bearings entirely. The absolute magnitude of these modular furniture
stores also make it easy for people to camp out overnight, as proven by the countless
YouTubers who decided to stick around after dark a few years ago. It might seem like fun, but if you change
a couple factors your trip to IKEA can quickly accelerate into terrifying territory. This is especially true when the IKEA is endlessly
big, and full of violent, faceless monsters. Yeah, you came into the store to buy a bedside
table and a lamp, and now you’re fighting for your life using the lamp as a weapon. Oh boy. SCP-3008 appears to be a big, abandoned IKEA
building. Nothing too weird about it from the outside,
just a blue and yellow warehouse in an empty car park. However, once you enter through those front
doors, everything changes. Anyone who strolls through the sliding doors
and walked far enough to be out of sight will be translocated to SCP-3008-1. Usually the victims won’t notice until they
try to leave, and are unable to find the exit. With no visible walls, and nothing implying
that the open space inside will end, this IKEA might be infinite. It has all the regular features though, long,
winding aisles, different departments populated with furniture for specific rooms, a cafeteria
every once in a while. You better like Swedish meatballs, because
that’s all you’re getting for the foreseeable future. Apparently a whole bunch of people have wandered
into this furniture store and never found their way out. Many have even been present since before the
Foundation contained it. Groups of folks have formed a rudimentary
civilization, and created little settlements to live in. There are multiple settlements, all spread
out over many kilometers within the ever-expanding Swedish megamart. These towns help the folks living inside feel
more like people again, but they also perform a more urgent function: they defend against
attacking entities. Designated as instances of 3008-2, these entities
are humanoid in shape, but often have exaggerated and inconsistent bodily proportions. Anyone who has seen one will describe it as
either too short or too tall. In addition to their weird bodies, these creepy
creatures lack a face and organs. Plus, they’re always wearing the IKEA uniform:
yellow shit, blue pants. Yeesh. Not exactly the customer service we’re looking
for, huh? Oh no thanks, I’m just browsing for now
haha. Please leave me alone. 3008-1 has a day-night cycle consistent with
the opening and closing times of a regular IKEA. The lights will flicker on in the morning,
and abruptly shut off once its night. During nighttime, the freakish 3008-2s will
become extremely violent and attempt to kill any human nearby. As they rip and tear, they can also be heard
uttering phrases like “The store is now closed, please exit the building.” Don’t you think I would if I could? Once fluorescent daylight returns, they revert
back to a passive state, and will not bother anyone unless provoked. There are exits, and people have escaped,
but the locations of these seem to be inconsistent, making it difficult for individuals to make
a concerted effort to leave. The most notable escapee made it out while
the Foundation maintained containment. He was being chased by an instance of 3008-2,
and killed immediately upon exit. Foundation agents discovered an IKEA-branded
notebook on him, with an account of his experience in the anomalous store. His account details wandering alone for a
while, before coming across a human settlement known as Exchange. Yes, the town was named after the section
it was nearest. He lived there for about six months, achieving
some sort of normalcy. It was kinda like when people settled down
in the Walking Dead, scavenging for supplies and warding off a steady influx of walkers. Crude weapons were fashioned, and lots of
meatballs consumed for sure. He noticed that there wasn’t any weather
in this space, and that all of the people living in the settlement had very different
accounts of the reality they originated in. Some folks had no knowledge of things like
the Statue of Liberty, or the International Space Station, even though they all seemed
to come from English-speaking North America. This opens the possibility of 3008 being multidimensional,
with people being fed in from different universes. Right before the journal-writer escaped, Exchange
was demolished by a massive group of “the staff.” Apparently they’re attracted to their own
corpses, and will attack whatever is nearby. Someone had left a chunk of staff in the supply
boxes, luring an insane amount of them to the settlement. There were so many staff corpses lining the
barricades that they could just climb up on the bodies and into the safe zone. That’s some truly chilling stuff. So now that we have a pretty vivid picture
of what’s going on inside SCP-3008, we need to start thinking about what would happen
if it were real. How would we deal with an anomaly like this
if it really existed? Oh boy. The easy answer would be to destroy it outright,
but who knows what would happen to the people within? Plus, how would we figure out where this thing
is? And It seems to pull people from all different
dimensions, so there’s no guarantee that taking out one facade would really make any
difference at all. So what would probably end up happening is
a whole lot of college students and city-dwellers ending up trapped in the catacombs of meta-IKEA. Some people might even enjoy it! The modern world involves so much existential
dread, it would be nice to have a singular purpose for a while: just survive. No currency, no taxes, no rent, no career
aspirations, just fortifying defences and scavenging for frozen yogurt. The journal left behind by the escapee is
a pretty solid description of what likely would happen if something like this were real. People would band together for safety, and
rebuild some semblance of a society. It’s just what people do! His account was quite sunshiney though, with
people from different settlements being totally generous and non-aggressive. This is less likely to happen in real life,
well, because people are dicks. Yes, different groups would band together
and form alliances based on mutual agreements. But there’s always something in short supply,
and people don’t often want to do without essentials. So inevitably, faction-based combat would
break out, adding to the dangers of the already terrifying staff. Truly, a Walking Dead scenario. Maybe due to the anomalous properties of the
IKEA, there would be enough food and drink and shelter for everyone! But even then, interpersonal conflicts about
best courses of action, IKEA politics, and relationships would arise. It’s human nature to fight with each other! Eventually a hierarchy would be formed, and
different groups would be afforded different amounts of power. Once the dust settles, I think there would
be potential for society to take leaps and bounds forward. There’s enough technology in an Ikea to
allow for some big scientific brains to recreate a lot of the amenities that exist in the outside
world. Although plentiful, I don’t think the staff
are very smart, and could likely be kept at a distance with electric fences, turrets,
and other security measures. The space inside is boundless too, so I’m
sure advanced methods of transportation would be developed as well. Soon enough, a parallel modern society would
exist within 3008, with all sorts of IKEA-brand items repurposed to be everything people need. Who knows, maybe once the society spreads
far enough the exits will become more apparent. But at that point, would the folks inside
even want to rejoin society as we know it? They’ve recreated their lives here, and
probably don’t feel like readjusting to the cruel, capitalistic hellworld on the outside. Long live the IKEA people! And that’s what there is to say about that! What do you think? Would a society blossom in the IKEA? Or would it crumble? How would you deal with being stuck in SCP-3008? Are there any stores that would work better? Let me know down in the comments. Speaking of comments, let’s take a look at
some of your more scandalous ones from last time:
xAPACHEx 666x asks “What if Clifford the dog was alive?” Dog food companies would be making BANK! Imagine how much food that dude must eat. Greg Williams says “In my imagination the
dinosaurs would win over the evil human empire” We can only hope, Greg! Let the dinos roam again! Idaioh Lee says “Happy new years guys! Good luck 2020!” And to you too! Dragon King says “I mean if the golden city
is real that would mean there are merfolk, vampires, mentours, and gorgons”
I say the more the merrier! Add some excitement to our dull, human lives! And that’s all the time we have for today! Thanks for watching, and I’ll see you next
time!